Arlo's birth story

We have had such a precious 3.5 weeks with our Arlo! I wrote about both Cooper and Finn's birth stories not long after they were born, and I wanted to do the same for Arlo, while the details are still fresh in my mind. The arrival of a new baby is such an incredible event – getting to meet the little one who has grown inside you for nearly ten months(!) and see the first glimpse of the person they are already. And this time, since Nicholas and I opted not to find out our baby's gender during the anatomy scan, we knew we would be surprised either way!

Much like my two previous boys, I had braxton hicks contractions for weeks leading up to my labor. And about five days before Arlo was born, I started having actual contractions. I let me midwife know, just in an abundance of caution, and we went about daily life. Every evening, I would have periodic contractions, and then they would ease up when I went to bed. I felt excited, knowing my body was gearing up for labor and preparing for baby's arrival. And I knew that we were prepared for it, whenever that would be.

On the day before Arlo was born, the weather was rather mild and I took Cooper and Finn for a walk around the neighborhood. They held hands with each other and me, and they ran so fast, enjoying each other and the fresh air. I did some curb walking, because I figured it wouldn't hurt anything. The boys found the one and only (filthy) puddle in the neighborhood and covered themselves in muddy water, so then we headed home (the boys simultaneously thrilled to be muddy and cold from the damp). While the boys were in the bath, they called me in from the next room to show me a rainbow on the bathroom wall, from the late afternoon sun, and I took a picture of it, touched by the sweetness of their excitement about it and how it felt significant to me.

That evening I spent with Nicholas, knitting on his sweater and winding down, per usual, only a few contractions here and there, and nothing intense. And then I woke up the next morning at 2am with an intense contraction. I went back to sleep, knowing I should rest, in case this was actual labor. I went on to have three or four more contractions like that, rather spread out, but growing in intensity.

By 5:30AM, I got up, excited because I had a feeling that this was labor and we were going to meet this sweet little person, finally. And I busied myself with getting a few things in order. At 6AM, I woke up Nicholas saying, I think we're going to have a baby today. By 7AM, I messaged my midwife and we spoke with my father-in-law, so he could come and pick up the big boys after they were awake and had breakfast. Nicholas and I ate breakfast too, our usual eggs and sausage.

During the next two hours, labor picked up significantly and the "surges" (ie contractions) were steadily growing in intensity and I had to sway or bend over and breathe through them. I also labored on hands and knees a bit during this time. Around 9AM, my father-in-law picked up the boys and I spoke to my midwife on the phone, letting her know I cancelled my chiropractor appointment for that morning (despite the short 12 minute drive, I had zero interest in getting in the car), and she cleared her morning schedule and made plans to come over fairly soon.

With my breathing, I focused on breathing in through my nose, followed by a long exhale through my mouth and I prayed through some breath prayers, namely,

• (inhale) More of You, (exhale) less of me
• an advent-themed one I particularly loved, based on John 1:5 (inhale) The Light shines in the darkness (exhale) And the darkness has not overcome it.
• (inhale) Emmanuel (exhale) God be with us. (based on Luke 2:14)

I found a few of these on an instagram post from @Littlewaychapel, and I really loved all that she included(!) I also prayed through Isaiah 41:10, when I started to feel weary.

At this point, the timeline gets a bit fuzzier, since I was entering transition. I ate some raw honey, sipped on water, and no longer talked unless I really needed to. I labored on the toilet for quite a while, and Nicholas worked on filling up the tub with hot water and any final preparations. The midwife and birth assistant were en route, and I knew the baby was coming soon, since I was feeling on the verge of needing to push. I got in the shower for exactly one contraction before emphasizing, I need to get in the tub. As I was making way over, the birth assistant arrived, checked in with me, and wholeheartedly agreed that it was a good time for me to get into the tub.

I felt immediate relief in the warm water, and I was glad I have saved it for the very end of labor, since it was so helpful with coping with the very intense contractions at this point. My midwife arrived after one contraction in the tub, I had two or three more and then I felt the instinctual urge to push. My contractions were still a few minutes apart at this time. With the next surge, Arlo crowned, and my midwife said, "Baby is crowning, the sac is intact, he's going to be born en caul." Even though I was more assuredly in the zone, I paused thinking, "Well, that's really cool." Another contraction and Arlo was born, breaking the sac himself after he came out. I heard Nicholas say, "It's a boy!" What joy! HE was here.

The cord was wrapped around him, which likely caused a small separation in my placenta, so I did have quite a bit more bleeding. Arlo was doing great, Nicholas blew on his face to stimulate him and encourage a healthy microbiome, and I held him as we transferred over to the bed so I could deliver the placenta quickly, which I did. The birth team administered herbs to help with the bleeding (and they did), and I got to hold our sweet boy.

The birth assistant brought me some orange juice to sip on, and Nicholas sat next to me to be close to Arlo too. The bleeding slowed significantly within a short amount of time, and they continued to monitor it, doing fundal massages, as needed. Nicholas held Arlo while they got me up to the bathroom. I remember asking the birth team what time he was born, and I couldn't believe that it was before noon! Nicholas and I agreed that it felt so odd that the majority of my labor has been during the day, since much of my previous labors had been at night.

Once we were settled in bed with our new baby(!) the midwife and her assistant worked on documenting and cleaning up the birth tub, gathering laundry, etc. Nicholas got me some baked peanut butter oatmeal to eat while I rested and held Arlo. After two hours or so, the birth team came back in to do all the full checks on Arlo, including an exam, getting a length and weight, and cutting the umbilical cord (Nicholas cut the cord this time). After 4 hours or so, my midwife and her assistant wrapped up paperwork and started a load of laundry, and saw themselves out.

This postpartum recovery has been very similar to my recovery after Finn's birth. What a difference I find it makes to be at home the entire time, in a very comfortable and familiar space. As I wrote in Finn's birth story:

There was never a moment of panic or deliberation of "should we go to the hospital now?" Our daily life eased into labor, and then after delivery, we eased into recovery mode, already at home. Physically, since I was more relaxed and less anxious, I felt less sore, and transition/pushing felt somewhat easier.

Both of our home births have been such wonderful experiences. My after birth pains were more intense then they had been with Finn, intensifying when Arlo nursed, but I had a tincture from Earthley that I used a few times that was helpful (my midwife said not to use it until several hours after delivery), and they certainly eased up over time.

We are so thankful for a safe labor and delivery. Thank you, Lord, for the life of Arlo, another rainbow baby, an answer to our prayers, and the sweetest addition to my family of boys! For the chance to celebrate the newest little boy in our family in the same season that we celebrate the birth of King Jesus, a baby boy who would change everything, for all eternity. For little blessings in our life, and for the biggest gift of your Son, You are a good God!